While You Were Offline: President Trump Compared the Impeachment Inquiry to a 'Lynching'

It's hard to know where to begin this week. Is it the story about presidential advisor Kellyanne Conway calling up a reporter to complain that they had mentioned her husband? Or is that tidbit about President Trump wanting federal agencies to cancel their subscriptions to The New York Times and The Washington Post? You know what? It's probably the news that the president's lawyers think Trump can't be investigated for criminal activity while in office. (Not everyone agrees with that, by the way.) Elsewhere in the world, Brexit is closer to actually happening but definitely isn’t a thing just yet, with a potential general election possibly standing in the way. With all of this happening, it’s no wonder that Kanye has returned. Only Greta Thunberg can save us now—if not the actual activist, then maybe the insect that’s been named after her. What have people been spending their internet hours talking about? Things like this, mostly.

What Happened: President Trump referred to his treatment by Congress as a "lynching."

What Really Happened: As efforts to impeach President Trump hit their one month anniversary—with support from the public constantly increasing—it's easy to wonder just how the president is handling it. Last week, he shared his thoughts on Twitter.

Yes, that’s right; the impeachment process—which, it’s worth remembering, is indeed being carried out with both due process and legal rights—is, in President Trump’s eyes, “a lynching.” It was, at best, an unfortunate choice of words, as many pointed out.

Response to the tweet in the media was widespread and filled with disapproval. Not everyone was upset, though.

At this point, let’s pause to get a little historical perspective.

Amongst the many, many people who spoke out against the president’s use of the word, one particular critic stands out, and not for the reasons he’d wish.

Just one problem, Mr. Biden...

The former VP made a statement apologizing for himself soon after his historical hypocrisy came to light.

OK, new rule: Everyone think about what they’re saying before they say it. What do you think?

The Takeaway: Leaving this here.

What Happened: As investigations into what happened between the US and Ukraine continue, this week’s testimony might have blown a hole in that whole "no quid pro quo" defense.

What Really Happened: Meanwhile, the actual impeachment investigation and inquiry into a potential quid pro quo arrangement between the president and Ukraine slowed down last week, out of respect for the death of Representative Elijah Cummings. Before hearings went on hold, however, there were still fireworks going off, starting with the testimony before the House of Representatives early in the week from William Taylor, the chargé d'affaires for the US embassy in Kiev, which proved to be … somewhat explosive, even though it took place behind closed doors.

The statement was revelatory and damning for the president, explicitly stating the illegality of what happened. But what about the rest of his testimony? If nothing else, it seemed lengthy—

—and, it seemed, damning:

The White House responded by pretty much denying everything and trying to cast doubt on Taylor himself.

Few were convinced.

A day after Taylor testified, the president responded personally.

This was contradicted by reality.

The Takeaway: And now, another take.

What Happened: It’s the same old story: When all else fails, storm into a secure location and try to pretend that this whole trial is out of order. Hey, it worked for Al Pacino in And Justice for All…

What Really Happened: Following Taylor’s testimony, things weren’t looking good for those hoping to carry water for the president. When faced with difficult circumstances and awkward realities, House Republicans did the only thing they could think of.

Yes, it really happened. (There was even pizza.) As ridiculous as things got, Republicans were seemingly self-aware enough to try to take to social media to argue their case.

This attempt at disruption found itself disrupted by the fact that many of the Republican lawmakers were risking national security.

If you’re wondering just what the Republicans in question are complaining about, it’s the idea that they’re getting shut out of the impeachment hearings. Unfortunately for them, it is just an idea, because it’s definitely not a reality, as it quickly became clear.

That would be awkward, if anyone involved had any sense of shame. Still, at least the president was happy.

The Takeaway: It was a stunt, yes. The important question is, was it a successful stunt?

What Happened: Mark Zuckerberg testified before lawmakers in Washington, DC, calling into question Facebook's affect on American democracy, once again.

What Really Happened: Last week, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg testified before Congress in a hearing that was, in theory, about the company’s cryptocurrency project Libra. In reality, though, it turned into an unsatisfying conversation about the lack of oversight Facebook employs over political speech on the platform. Let’s just agree that this was not Zuckerberg’s finest moment. At all.

A strange side effect of the hearing: the internet remembering just how suspicious it was en masse of Zuckerberg’s haircut.

The main event for many, though, was what happened when New York Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez took over questioning.

After watching that display, maybe you’re feeling sorry for him. You probably on't need to.

The Takeaway: Turns out, reality isn’t as good as movies after all…

What Happened: Folks started going to the Bronx in search of the stairs where Arthur Fleck danced in Joker.

What Really Happened: Of all the things that people expected to take away from Joker, it’s fair to say that turning a set of steps into something resembling iconic is unexpected.

Yes, the Bronx is now a tourist destination thanks to some steps that have become curiously hot, much to the distress of locals. How did this happen? What did we, as a society, do wrong that this happened?

Some, at least, managed to see the bright side of what was happening.

Others, not so much.

(Apparently, AOC was everywhere last week.)

The Takeaway: Is this some kind of meta bit about what it feels like to be the Joker and live in a world that makes no sense? Where is the madness going to end?

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