My Beating Heart. Ostensibly a relaxation device, it is in fact a cynical arrow aimed straight at the hearts of new age saps, the kind of people who might believe that angels actually help them to find a parking space. As if the promise of love isn't enough, the people behind My Beating Heart have thrown some technology into the marketing mix. Not any tech, mind you, but some of the most up to date buzzwords to be found: Haptics and Artificial Intelligence.
The $50 pillows 'beats' to a randomized, algorithmically controlled pattern, mimicking a human heart in a relaxed state. The needy whiner's own heart will synchronize, relaxing them in turn. It is especially suited to those who sleep alone:
Right now, of course, the pillow is being hawked at the Mother's Day gift market. My mother will not be receiving one. She will be getting the same thing I buy her every year, the same thing that our family has used to relax for generations: Gin and cigarettes.
Product page [My Beating Heart]
