The Narrative Stylings of "Kenneth Eng, God"

I have become fascinated by the bizarre career of young Kenneth Eng, self-declared "Asian Supremacist," "God of the Universe," and author of the startlingly-titled Dragons: Lexicon Triumvirate and The 0th Dimension. The 22-year-old has been stirring up controversy for his columns in San Francisco's AsianWeek magazine, where he's written a column called "Why I Hate Blacks," as well as another called, "Proof That Whites Inherently Hate Us." Here's a great quote from the latter:

Most Asians knowthat everywhere we go, white/black/Hispanic people hurl racist remarksat us. I have already received about 10 racist remarks in the pastthree months and I have only been out of my home a handful of times.

As Hyphen points out, it's hard to know which is scarier: that Eng published this poop, or that he's only been out of his home a handful of times in the past three months. The best part of all this is that now you can read some of Kenneth Eng's insane ramblings on his Amazon blog, where he describes himself as "striving against the mass ofconformity that is the flesh all around me," and which recently included this gem:

I don't know about you, but I masturbate allthe time. It's not going to affect me in any way, aside from making meneed to take baths more often.

So true. You can also read his blog to find out more about Eng's life as a super-genius "God" who writes fantasy novels containing meaningless epithets like "lexicon triumvirate" in their titles. What does that even mean, anyway? A three-headed creature with a big vocabulary? A government run by three people with a passion for writing down every word they know? And what the hell does it have to do with dragons? Plus, why does the dragon on the cover of his book have a gun? I'm gloriously confused.

Eng's goal in life is to work on comic books, particularly at Marvel. But that hasn't stopped him from querying other comic book publishers about working for them. Read below the fold for a tale from a comic book editor who exchanged emails with Eng . . .

Hilary of IGN Comics wrote on her blog last year that she received the following email from Eng:

Are you looking for any new writers? I am the youngest publishedscience fiction novelist in America and I am very into comic books. Myfirst novel, Dragons: Lexicon Triumvirate, will soon be a comic bookitself. Furthermore, I am highly interested in the philosophy ofcomics, having published a few articles myself.

Kenneth Eng, novelist

I love how he uses the word "novelist" after his name, as if it's some kind of title. So Hilary replied:

Ummm... seriously dude, all of us write novels so we can get the hell out of here.

We don't have any more freelance money, unfortunately.

And Eng barked back:

Yeah, but my novels are cooler than yours bitch. Don't contact me again.

Worried that she'd spurned a truly great talent, Hilary looked into Eng's novel, *Dragon: Lexicon Triumvirate, *and discovered that she had truly missed out. Check out these choice bits she gathered from the book:

"Time is not a concept. It is a word."

This is how the novel begins. Wow. Mindblowing stuff -- and this book stars dragons!

The dialogue is also top-notch. Here is one fine example:

"Interesting," muttered Dennagon to himself. "The force of gravityis 9.8 meters per second squared on this planet, but not in space. I
wonder if 'space' actually exists."

And there's ACTION!

"Dennagon nonchalantly dropped down from his perched position tothe ground. Without even taking his eyes off his book, he casuallythrust his fist out, punching a hole straight through the head of oneof his enemies as it charged. The decapitated body still handing fromhis forearm, he merely shifted his fist to the side so that the otherscould run into it. Expectedly, they did, blasting apart their ownskulls against his scaly knuckles."

Yup, Eng truly is "God." Too bad he gets called names when he leaves the house once a month. Now you too can read his work.

Dragons: Lexicon Triumvirate [via Amazon]